Life Sucks Sometimes!

And…. Life for me lately has sucked….

OK what’s on MY list…..BTW I know you’ve got a list sometimes, this is merely me sharing mine.The last thing we need is sympathy only the realisation that we never struggle alone.

So here’s what I’ve struggled with lately… –

The fear around raising teens & having enough courage to let go of my adult kids, and if you’ve been following ….yes Vaughn did get his nose pierced! I knew he would and I did freak a little…..until Greg said hang on…”you wrote a Facebook post telling you knew he would”…sometimes we respond re actively because we think we should! There may have been a glimmer of —“people will think you’re a thug” WHO GIVES A …” what people think, don’t you reckon? I just sent Vaughn a message….”Nothing you decide to do with your human form can ever change the creative, emotional, loving, adventurous being you were born to be”. I held myself back from saying…ONLY DRUGS & ALCOHOL CAN DO THAT!!!! I’ll slip that in later.

Love this…..  “Raising free range kids means teaching kids to fail at solving interesting problems because that’s the only way you ever get good at solving interesting problems” Seth Godin

– my husbands deep worry️ about serious changes in his work life (me saying it’s as it should be just doesn’t cut it anymore and we end up in all sorts of upheaval. Gladly we manage to come through relatively unscathed and realise we do really love each other.  I say, ditch the business and start making cakes!!

Greg’s 50th Birthday Cake HE made for himself  Ok. I digress (that’s me remember – Bonnie 5 ways!)
I just had to show you why he needs to forget plumbing and make cakes for a living.

Back to my temporary “stuff”…

– My sibling crises.-The saga that never ends and may never find resolution. I’m learning slowly, to let go of some people I love.

– My 68 year old brother in another life threatening breakdown perpetuated by his long struggle with bi polar disorder. I have remained fully detached. Love you Gerard.The title of my upcoming book…Growing up surrounded by mental diseases. LOL –

The thing we call work/life balance. Give that up there will be no perfect balance- EVER. “Its like we’re on a see-saw, some days you’ll feel you got it right and other days you’ll need to clean up your mess or do something differently. And on and on the see-saw will teeter, forever and ever amen. It’s ok!! REALLY! just do your best each day- sometimes you’ll wish you didn’t do or say this and that. It’s all good, tomorrow’s coming soon. Let’s take the pressure off trying to get it perfect. We wont!

– And most the devastating, the death of my sweet sweet sister in law Anne. Deeply destroying us all especially my brother Michael. Anne & Michael did not have children.

We look over the fence and think… How do they have it so together. Why do their lives seem so together and mine is such a shit fight. Well, the truth is they’re suffering too, just like you. They may not speak out about it but as humans on this planet I can bet they’re copping their fair share. I hear ya. There’s always someone worse off than me. It’s the truth. At the same time, please honour what it is for YOU in the sucky times. If we always brushed it because we felt guilty for how it makes us feel, our cells, body and spirit store the stories up. That’s only breeding ground for physical sickness as well as anxiety.

Give yourself the respect and space to gently deal with your issues, accept them in order to move through them. Speak to someone that loves you or get pro advise if you need it. Just one tip, I’ve learnt the hard way, on sharing your story. It’s a great way to set it free. But share itONCE. Talking your tales over and over  with everyone that will listen, wont change your situation, it only gives it destructive power, it feeds your ego with what it craves… self pity and righteousness. “See what life did to me – poor me!!!”

“Whenever anything negative happens to you, there is a DEEP LESSON concealed within it, although you may not see it at the time” Eckhart Tolle

To struggle doesn’t make us inadequate or a failure. Sure, it makes us feel so friggin vulnerable, but the truth is our gifts are disguised as struggles. Loaded always with divine instructions. We all have the opportunity to come away from the self pity and take action on a better course. If we get quiet and listen, that is.

Sure your stuff reads a little differently to mine but I know you battle too at times.There’s something incredibly beautiful about our dark days.They’re a reminder that we’re identical to each other on a deeper level. Each and every one of us. Thankfully we flow in AND out of them and the sun shines again at every exit point of an episode.

The days we’re sitting in those hardcore crappy times and recognise that it’s all just part of life. I believe is the day we start to understand what life is meant to be about.

P>S>S I will too I promise!